Paradise: "Melissa"

aradise - paradise - it's been on my mind since last night's dream. I decided to check out this "St. Clair Shores," see what it's about because it is in such a different neighborhood than the warehouse, or the mountainside tea party with goddesses - although I do remember a bit of a dream in which I stood out of the rain under a magnolia tree for want of an umbrella. Anyway ...

The building was virtually empty but for one room, an office at the back next to the kitchen. The place had a 1950's air about it and the owners, I think, could probably renovate it quite easily and find a sizable clientele if they wanted.

I headed toward the office, but stopped short as I passed the fridge. A pamphlet caught my eye because it looked to be of the same vintage as the building - but I was in it, looking just as I do now! The pamphlet was an advert for some sort of cruise in "The Big Yellow Taxi," and there I was sitting on a seat in the stern of this big yellow boat, being soundly kissed by the man whose bloody footsteps I'd followed to the warehouse from the watchtower. (I could never forget those shoulders or that dark, dark hair!)

Now that I think about it, I also saw the Faerie Queen and her King in that picture. They looked like the photographer caught them just before a kiss. Uncle Joe was there in that amazing DREAM hat, kissing his Bride. The little girl from so many other dreams was there, too. I decided to keep the pamphlet to study later and continued on into the office.

I remember there being walls of built-in shelves and walls of mullioned windows. I remember seeing a fool's cap on one of the shelves. The desk was big and old and gorgeous; an antique already in the 1950's, its finish had been lovingly maintained and looked like ebony satin. Just as I noted a book lying open atop the desk, the antique dial phone rang and, I admit it, I screeched and jumped!

I figured that since this was not my place I should not answer the phone, but then again the pamphlet made me think that I was supposed to be there and thus supposed to answer. I reached for the receiver - and stopped. The phone was connected to an answering machine, so I decided to exercise caution and screen the call. So glad I did because it was my father!

"This is Charles Barker, Melissa. Your father. It seems you've forgotten that. You need some serious discipline, girl. You can defy me all you want, but you can never deny me. You are a Barker. Act like one. You will do as I say or I will cut you off." The click when he hung up was deafening.

Somehow, thankfully, I remembered I could interact with the dream so I told myself, "Just breathe. Breathe. The answer will come to you." Slowly I looked around the room, then back down at the book on the desk. I could see that there was text on both pages, but I could only read one highlighted section on page 259 - '...the message was: "Don't grow, and whatever you do, don't abandon people to pursue your dream."'

"Wow," I thought, "enough said." I looked at the front of the book for the author and title: Julia Cameron, "The Vein of Gold - A Journey to Your Creative Heart."

Before I could form another thought my Crow flew in and perched on my shoulder to give me his characteristic greeting and comb his beak through my hair. He held something shiny in one of his claws and relinquished it with a gurgle of pleasure when I held up my hand - an iPod. This being a dream there was, of course, an iHome on a shelf near the desk. I can take a hint.

After that message from good ole dad I never expected to laugh and dance and feel out-loud happy quite so soon, but when the Counting Crows song began and my Crow moved to the beat as if he thought he had become a bird-of-paradise bent on courting his lady, I could do nothing but join him.

So, I am quite curious just how the Dreaming Universe will show me how to combine the pursuit of my dream with "The Big Yellow Taxi," all those wonderful people on the taxi, AND the Stranger kissing me. Oh, and yes, my Crow.