Musings.16: Barbara

erhaps you've seen one, too? A blindingly brilliant smile from a stranger that hits you with all the wattage of a lightning bolt and, most curiously, both roots you to the ground as it spins you around counterclockwise! I write this and I think of Natalie Cole singing her cover of "Orange Colored Sky on"Unforgettable" ... and, yes, such a smile is unforgettable.

I had been wondering what would be 'Melissa's' first glimpse of her 'Dark Man's' face and I love that it happens this way. All her previous glimpses have been enigmatic, incomplete and, to an extent, suffused with pain. (Remember his bloody shoulders?) Well, now she sees his smiling face and evidence of the depth of his feelings for her as she realizes he's written poetry about her, his Muse.

This is a significant development in 'Melissa's' story for another reason. I've written previously about the connection to timelessness, to depth of vision, to universal love and truth that comes to those who sincerely practice art. What we are seeing with this development is that in his sincere practice of poetry the 'Dark Man' finds reason to smile at and about his Muse. That is not to be taken lightly.

The book of poetry is, like the poet himself, enigmatic. I am intrigued. "Sonnets to Ophelia" and Renaissance dress? What will we learn about 'Melissa' from these hints?

Perhaps more intriguing is the setting for the dream and the activity we see - princesses drinking tea from their slippers as part of a performance. "The Twelve Dancing Princesses" was one of my favorite fairy tales as a child so I will enjoy watching how it unfolds in the context of 'Melissa's' story.

One part of the dream, its location, matches my life experience. Years ago I lived in Williamsburg, VA and on a number of occasions I visited the National Park at Jamestown, along the James River. There is a centuries-old chapel on the site and from a certain perspective one can stand inside knowing the river flows past off to the right. For some reason this past Easter season I was particularly touched whenever our cantor, Samuel, would sing that verse, "I saw water flowing from the right side of the temple." I was quite happy to realize it would be a lovely part of 'Melissa's' dream.

She has presumed to pull herself away from the people and situations that once left her "formulated, sprawling on a pin ... pinned and wriggling on the wall." (T. S. Eliot, "Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock") Now she has the 'Dark Man's' smile to light her way, and some enchanting stories appearing in her dreams. Wonder is blossoming in her life. I wonder what will happen next.

Tea Party: "Melissa"

h, I wish I knew how I could have lived so long in ignorance of my dreams! Every one has been glorious and leaves me feeling transported for DAYS afterward and I think nothing could possibly top it, but then that is exactly what happens! It is as if the ... the ... the Dreaming Universe is determined to outdo itself.

Last night I was so happy to receive my Crow in my dream. He stood before me and danced a bit and invited me to fly with him, as he always does, but I detected something ... something ... in his manner which piqued my curiosity. "We must fly. We must fly to the western paradise where you shall have tea." We flew and I savored his strength and his beauty. I always forget everything else when he is near and last night was no exception. Our flight path was steep. We soared up above the clouds and I think we flew to a height higher even than his rose-strewn nest!

We flew toward a mountain. The sunlight above the clouds bathed the mountainside in iridescence and I looked at my hands and arms to see if they, too, had such a glow. My Crow cawed, adjusted his wings, and landed on a ledge near a stunning and ancient magnolia tree in bloom. From somewhere beyond the magnolia I heard calls of "kek-kek-kek" and "kalooo kaleeooo" as if in answer to my Crow, who shook out his plumage, hopped onto my shoulder and preened a bit more as I walked in the direction of the bird calls.

Nothing my Crow could have done would have prepared me for the breathtaking sight of the two glorious women who stepped forward to greet me as I neared a table set for tea. They ... They were so rare in appearance that I felt I must have lost blood or oxygen or something because I wasn't certain my eyes were working properly. Both women had dark hair; one of them appeared distinctly Asian in her features and dress. A whooping crane stood next to her, watching me solemnly.

The second woman - oh, dear, how do I describe her? I could not believe my eyes and I feared she could hear my mind screaming, "Manners, Melissa! Manners!" because I could neither move nor speak. All I wanted to do was watch her. She was the Faery Queen - the Faery Queen on the card my Crow gave me! She was like the sunshine bathing the mountain and like champagne and ... my brain is locking up again as I write this!

Both women were wonderfully gracious, especially in the face of my thunderstruck appearance. They bid me welcome - their voices were just as beautiful as all else about them - and directed my attention to the table set for tea. I noticed two things then: the table was set with six place settings, and the Faery Queen stopped to feed a falcon on a perch. "Xi Wang Mu," the Fairy Queen nodded toward the other woman, "insists I spoil him, but he is a love and we work so well together. A morsel now and then is a treat from my heart."

"Our hostesses have arrived," Xi Wang Mu spoke as the sound of wings reached us and foliage rustled around us. Three women borne on the backs of three swans landed and walked to us, their faces wreathed in welcoming smiles. I think they were dressed as Amazons. Their golden hair shimmered in the sunlight and their creamy skin glowed.

How can I ever describe the experience of a tea party with goddesses? I hosted tea parties as a little girl with my tea set spread on a tree stump before my stuffed bears and ponies. This was beyond anything I could ever have imagined. Is this somehow connected to the Chardonnay I bought? Is it possible? The label did say, "Discover the goddess", but nothing prepared me for this!

The Valkyries brought mead - with gratitude expressed to the Faery Queen for her industrious bees - and meats and insisted upon serving me - me! Xi Wang Mu, whom the Valkyries addressed as "Queen Mother," brought peaches, like miniatures suns, from her own beloved garden. To my surprise the Faery Queen brought cakes made with Guinness and cakes made with oats, and honey. She winked and smiled sweetly before she told me she knew Guinness to be a particular favorite of mine.

The scent of the magnolias and the buzzing of bees were a perfect complement to the company and the light. We each plucked a bloom from the tree and tucked it between our breasts. They read poetry, some of it about wings. I knew one of the poems, T. S. Eliot's "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock." I remember untying my tongue enough to ask them, seated around me, "Do I dare to eat a peach?"

Oh, how shall I presume to speak my dream of tea with the goddesses? "I have had a dream past the wit of man to say what dream it was". Here I am, now, with human voices outside on the street below, "And the afternoon ... sleeps so peacefully!" I cling to this dream even when "after tea and cakes and ices" the Crow bade me climb on his back and I looked up to see those goddesses, their arms "braceleted and white and bare," blowing kisses.